Dear crazy drunk bar skank
It was lovely to meet you at the Fishbowl on Monday. I always enjoy it when a woman pulls me away from the bar to dance. I’ll bet all the guys tell you how fun you are.
And I’ll bet they all think it’s cute when you tell them how you almost gave your dad a heart attack when you told him that you were dating a muslim. Ho, ho, ho, what a story! I have a crazy ex who pulled that on me once. For a long time, I thought that kind of stuff was really endearing - hey, I’m a prankster! Here’s a partner in crime! I had a lot of fun with her causing trouble for a while. When she told her mom I was muslim, I thought it was funny.
But once we started dating, I realized it was just a game, no different from the games she was playing on me and everybody else in her life. And after a while, the games wore on me to the point where I couldn’t trust her anymore about anything.
I’m sure you’re a lot of fun to hang out with, crazy drunk bar skank, but do me a favor - if you’re going to play games, at least have some new ones.
Sincerely,
Damin